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Rude greeting cards

Rude Cards

Chuckles guaranteed! Check out our collection of the rudest and most hilarious greeting cards out there, but be warned they are not for the faint-hearted!
  • 365 Days since you fell out of a vagina - Maktus
    €3.95

    365 Days since you fell out of a vagina

    365 Days since you fell out of a vagina Greeting Card Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 150 mm x 150 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dis...

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    €3.95
  • 8 out of 10 Cats - Maktus
    €3.95

    8 out of 10 Cats

    I've heard it was more like 9, either way if there's a c*** in your life this might be a wonderful Birthday card for them. Even more if they love c...

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    €3.95
  • A Few Words - Maktus
    €3.95

    A Few Words

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • A Good Man - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    A Good Man

    Blank inside, 140x140mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • A Wise Woman - Maktus
    €4.00

    A Wise Woman

    Blank inside, 140x140mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope.

    €4.00
  • €3.95

    Ain't Getting Shit for Christmas

    You ain't getting shit for christmas. Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 105 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €3.95
  • €3.95

    All-Nighter

    You know you're OLD when an 'ALL-nighter' means not getting up to pee. Blank inside, 170x120mm, printed on FSC accredited board, individually packa...

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    €3.95
  • Artritis - Maktus
    €3.95

    Artritis

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope Official David Shrigley Card This card measures 120 x 170mm A...

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    €3.95
  • Awkward Star Trek Orgy - Maktus
    €4.00

    Awkward Star Trek Orgy

    Awkward Star Trek Orgy Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 150 mm x 150 mm◙ White Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • Bang You On The Coffee Table - Maktus
    €3.95

    Bang You On The Coffee Table

    Banging your big toe on the corner of the coffee table is painful. The other kind of banging not so I hope!

    €3.95
  • Basic bitch patch - Maktus
    €5.95

    Basic bitch patch

    Basic Bitch Patch Greeting Card. Includes a funky iron-on patch. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 105 mm x 105 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included....

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    €5.95
  • Being old means you can never trust a fart - Maktus
    €3.95

    Being old means you can never completely trust a fart

    Being old means you can never completely trust a fart! Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • €3.80

    Big Birthday Gobshite

    Big Birthday Gobshite Greeting Card Designed and sold in Dublin by the Maktus art department! Check out our funny, cool, Quirky Rude, Hilarious ran...

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    €3.80
  • Birth Of Kanye - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    Birth Of Kanye West

    Birth Of Kanye greeting card. Funny card features Kim Kardashian and Kanye West. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 150 mm x 150 mm◙ White Envelope...

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    €4.00
    Sold out
  • Birthday Card Present - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.95

    Birthday Card Present

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
    Sold out
  • Birthday girl promises to stay sober - Maktus
    €3.95

    Birthday girl promises to stay sober

    Birthday girl promises to stay sober◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €3.95
  • Birthday Kisses from Donald - Maktus
    €3.95

    Birthday Kisses from Donald

    What we all wish for. Birthday kisses from Donald Trump. Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • Birthday Time - Maktus
    €4.00

    Birthday Time

    Fuck Yeah Birthday Time! Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually packaged in a cello bag with a coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • Blow me - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.95

    Blow me

    "Blow Me!" Blank inside, 180x125mm, individually packaged in a cello bag with a brown craft envelope

    €3.95
    Sold out
  • Borat - Maktus
    €3.80

    Borat Sexy Time

    Borat knows how to turn da ladies on. Lets Make Sexy Time Greeting Card Designed and sold in Dublin by the Maktus art department! llustrated by Sha...

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    €3.80
  • €4.00

    Born Sweet

    Blank inside, the saying on this card is, "Born sweet...fuck knows what happened." Darling Divas combines the talents of Irish designer Clare Jorda...

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    €4.00
  • Breast Friends - Maktus
    €3.95

    Breast Friends

    Breast Friends greeting card We've all got a Breast Friend that we go absolutely crazy with when were together...this card just proves it! Inside M...

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    €3.95
  • €3.95

    Bubblewrap Fart

    "She tried to blame the bubblewrap, but they both knew the truth. That was a fart." Blank inside, 170x120mm, printed on FSC accredited board, indiv...

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    €3.95
  • Butterflies and Boners - Maktus
    €3.80

    Butterflies And Boners

    You Give Me Butterflies And Boners, Lots Of Boners Greeting Card Designed and sold in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  Check out our funny, co...

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    €3.80
  • Butterflies and Boners VALENTINES - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.80

    Butterflies and Boners VALENTINES

    You Give Me Butterflies And Boners, Lots Of Boners Valentines Day Greeting Card Designed and sold in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  Check ou...

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    €3.80
    Sold out
  • Cock, Pussy, and Ass - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.50
    Sold out
  • Colossal Prick - Maktus
    €3.95

    Colossal Prick

    Congratulations! One not being a colossal prick today. Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • Colour In The Sections - Maktus
    €3.95

    Colour In The Sections

    Colour in the sections you have completed in your life so far. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 180 mm x 125mm◙ Coloured Envelope Included.◙ Quic...

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    €3.95
  • Condolences - Maktus
    Condolences - Maktus
    €4.00

    Condolences

    Congratulations on the birth of your baby. My condolences to your vagina at this difficult time. Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Congratulations.. You Made A Tiny Person With Your Genitals

    Congratulations.. You Made A Tiny Person With Your Genitals Blank inside, 177x127mm, printed on FSC accredited paper. Individually packaged in a ce...

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    €4.00
  • Cup of shut the fuck up - Maktus
    €3.95

    Cup Of Shut The Fuck Up

    How about a nice cup of shut the fuck up? Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope  

    €3.95
  • Dad I'm Pregnant - Maktus
    Dad I'm Pregnant - Maktus
    €4.00

    Dad I'm Pregnant

    Dad I'm pregnant. Shit, wait, wrong card, sorry about that, happy birthday. Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a cello bag with brown...

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    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €3.95

    Die Already

    "Die Already"  Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually packaged in a cello bag with a white envelope

    €3.95
    Sold out
  • Die Trying - Maktus
    €3.50

    Die Trying

    €3.50
  • Do these pants make me look weird - Maktus
    €4.00

    Do These Pants Make Me Look Weird

    Do These Pants Make Me Look Wierd card. Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a cello bag with blue envelope

    €4.00
  • Dogs Bollocks - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.95

    Dogs Bollocks

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with white envelope

    €3.95
    Sold out
  • Donald Trump Hates you - Maktus
    €3.95

    Donald Trump Hates You

    Donald Trump Hates you!! You must be doing something right. Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • Even wankers deserve a birthday card - Maktus
    €3.95

    Even Wankers Deserve a Birthday Card

    Do you know any wankers? I'm sure you do but just because they are one doesn't mean that they should have a Birthday card. Everyone, okay most peop...

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    €3.95
  • Everything happens for a reason - Maktus
    €4.00

    Everything Happens For A Reason

    Everything Happens For A Reason. Sometimes the reason is you are stupid and make bad choices. Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a ce...

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    €4.00
  • Everything is Shit - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.95

    Everything is Shit

    Here's a lovely card for everyone in Ireland right now. Who care's if everything a big drama, you can send this card to that special person to shar...

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    €3.95
    Sold out
  • F**king Drunk - Maktus
    €4.00

    F**king Drunk

    Yeah Yeah Yeah Birthday etc. Now Lets get fucking drunk. Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a cello bag with a coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €3.95

    Fake Smiles Everyone

    Fake smiles everyone, its another birthday! Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • €4.00

    Fantastic Bitch

    Happy Birthday You Fantastic Bitch. Blank inside, 177x127mm, printed on FSC accredited paper. Individually packaged in a cello bag with a brown cra...

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    €4.00
  • Flyer than a muh - Maktus
    €3.95

    Flyer Than A Muh' Fucka

    Flyer Than A Muh'Fucka Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a cello bag with a white envelope

    €3.95
  • Forget it Bitches that cake is mine! - Maktus
    Sold out
    €3.95

    Forget it Bitches that cake is mine!

    Forget it bitches, that cake is mine! Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95
    Sold out
  • Fox shit up - Maktus
    €3.95

    Fox Shit Up

    I come. I fox shit up. I Leave. Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a cello bag with a coloured envelope

    €3.95
  • Fuck Off Balloon card - Maktus
    €3.95

    Fuck Off Balloon card

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually packaged in a cello bag with brown craft envelope Official David Shrigley Card This card measures 120 x 170...

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    €3.95
  • Fuck quinoa! I have cake - Maktus
    €3.95

    Fuck Quinoa! I Have Cake

    Fuck Quinoa! I Have cake! Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €3.95