Skip to content
Our store in the George's Arcade is open 10.30-6pm Mon-Fri, 11-6pm Saturday and 1-5pm on Sundays
Our store in the George's Arcade is open 10.30-6pm Mon-Fri, 11-6pm Saturday and 1-5pm on Sundays
Rude greeting cards

Rude & Offensive Greeting Cards

Chuckles guaranteed! Check out our collection of the rudest and most hilarious greeting cards out there, but be warned they are not for the faint-hearted!
  • €4.00

    Throttle A Chicken

    Slow steady strokes Penelope, you're not trying to throttle a chicken here. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 148 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelop...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Terry The Jellyfish

    Life was tough for Terry the two-tentacled jellyfish◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • You Vile Bitch, You Fat old Cunt - Maktus
    €4.00

    You Vile Bitch, You Fat Old Cunt

    You vile bitch, you fat old cunt Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Sniff It Barry, It's Not Marmite

    Sniff it Barry, its not Marmite.... Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 148 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • Moody cunt card - Maktus
    €4.00

    Moody cunt card

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with brown craft envelope

    €4.00
  • Awkward Star Trek Orgy - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    Awkward Star Trek Orgy

    Awkward Star Trek Orgy Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 150 mm x 150 mm◙ White Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    Sorry It's Fucking Rubbish!

    Here's your birthday card. I'm gonna spill my sacks! Sorry It's Fucking Rubbish!◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dis...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Cup of shut the fuck up - Maktus
    €4.00

    Cup Of Shut The Fuck Up

    How about a nice cup of shut the fuck up? Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope  

    €4.00
  • Fuck You Cat - Maktus
    €4.00

    Fuck You Cat

    Fuck You Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Play With His Balls

    She Loved Nothing More Than To Play With His Balls. Blank inside, 177x127mm, printed on FSC accredited paper. Individually packaged in a cello bag ...

    View full details
    €4.00
    Sold out
  • See this cat - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    See This Cat.. It Doesn't Give A Fuck About Your Birthday

    See This Cat.. It Doesn't Give A Fuck About Your Birthday Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • To a special cunt - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    To A Special Cunt

    To A Special Cunt Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • Ur Mum Shagged Ur Dad - Maktus
    Ur Mum Shagged Ur Dad - Maktus
    €4.00

    Ur Mum Shagged Ur Dad

    Ur mum shagged ur dad. If you ask me I think its sick we're celebrating this. Blank inside, 150x150mm, individually package in a cello bag with bro...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Why The Long Face?

    Why The Long Face? Give me some beer you cunt. Horse in bar illustration  Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with a yello...

    View full details
    €4.00
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    You're So Beautiful, Like A Tree

    You're So Beautiful, Like A Tree Or A High Class Prostitute...show us a more hilarious card!  Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 105 mm◙ C...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Help The Fanny - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    Help The Fanny

    Help the fanny reach climax Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 180 mm x 125mm◙ Coloured Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • Seriously? You Were The Sperm That Won? - Maktus
    €4.00

    Seriously? You Were The Sperm That Won?

    Seriously ? You Were The Sperm That Won Greeting Card The perfect funny, quirky, cool Irish designed birthday greeting card from our Range of greet...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Shut the fuck up - Maktus
    €4.00

    Shut The Fuck Up

    Well Done! Now Shut The Fuck Up About It Greeting Card The perfect funny, quirky, cool Irish designed birthday greeting card from our Range of gree...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €2.00

    Get My Hand On Your Meat

    I wanna get my hands on your meat! Who doesn't love a nice bit of salami, frankfurter and bologna sausage? Well if you're as hungry for some meat a...

    View full details
    €2.00
  • €4.00

    Fathers Day Fucking Kids

    Fathers Day Fucking Kids Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 120 mm x 170 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Birthday Poo

    Birthday Poo Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 140 mm x 140 mm◙ Orange Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • Still A Cock - Maktus
    €4.00

    Still A Cock

    Happy Birthday. Sadly You're No Longer A Spring Chicken But You Are Still A Cock Greeting Card Designed in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  In...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Cock In A Box

    From a secret admirer.....cock in a box Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 120 mm x 170 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Ya Big Tick

    Happy Birthday Ya Big Tick Greeting Card The perfect funny, quirky, cool Irish designed birthday greeting card from our Range of greeting cards. De...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    You Look Like Shit

    You Look Like Shit, Dave.◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    How To Be A Happier Person Children Bin

    Does it spark joy? Nope? Ok in the bin it goes then. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 105mm◙ Bright Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dis...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Fan Fucking Tastic!

      Illustrated by Katie Abey Card dimensions: 105 x 148mm (A6). Packed with a brown fleck envelope.Standard letter post.Blank inside.

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • Sold out
    €4.50

    Shit Fuck Damn Sorry!

    Shit Fuck Damn Sorry! Illustrated by Bench Pressed.Lovingly letterpressed at 1973 HQ using a 1962 Heidelberg Windmill Platen on luxurious recycled ...

    View full details
    €4.50
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    Licking his balls

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with cream envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Knickers

    Blank inside 175x125mm on an FSC certified uncoated board Individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    HRT

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Loved A Good Fart

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • 17 Million - Maktus
    €4.00

    17 Million Birthday Card

    You've the same birthday as Seventeen million other people- Not so fucking special now, are you?! Greeting Card Designed and sold in Dublin by the ...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Leo Picks you something Special

    This year I thought I'd pick you something very special- Leo Varadkar. Join Leo and the boys for some partying and boozing!! Designed in store  The...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Cake and Cock Greeting Card

    I hope Your Birthday is Filled With Love Laughter and Co - Hey! You knew what I meant! Designed in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  Inside Mes...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Inner Peace Greeting Card

    'The quest for inner peace begins with these 4 magical words... ...not my f*cking problem'' Blank inside, 150 x150mm, Printed on FSC accredited bo...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Magical Bitch Greeting Card

    'Happy Birthday to the most magical bitch I know' Blank inside, 150x150mm, Printed on FSC accredited board sourced from sustainable sources

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    Menopausal Greeting Card

    There was a very good chance she was feeling menopausal Each card measures 5″ x 7″ and comes with a coloured envelope. Printed on FSC certified glo...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Dumble Draw

    Hilarious Dumble Draw Greeting Card Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Blue Craft Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch! A6 greeting ...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.50

    Your Present Is On It's Way

    Lovingly letterpressed at 1973 HQ using a 1962 Heidelberg Windmill Platen on luxurious recycled board. 108x140mm

    €4.50
    Sold out
  • Sold out
    €4.50

    Happy Birthday Motherfucker

    Lovingly letterpressed at 1973 HQ using a 1962 Heidelberg Windmill Platen on luxurious recycled board. 108X140mm

    €4.50
    Sold out
  • Sold out
    €4.50

    Birthday Boy Card

    Send some love to a special birthday boy with this naughty little card! Embossed and finished with spot gloss for that extra colour pop! Size: 105...

    View full details
    €4.50
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    Ye Olde Cunt

    Ye Olde Cunt Card designed and illustrated by Haima Vahid in collaboration with the Maktus Studio. Dimensions: 150x150mm Blank Inside Envelope incl...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €2.00

    All Outta Fucks!

    All Outta Fucks! Card designed and illustrated by Haima Vahid in collaboration with the Maktus Studio. Dimensions: 150x150mm Blank Inside Envelope ...

    View full details
    €2.00
  • €4.00

    Big Birthday Bollox

    Big Birthday Bollox Card designed and illustrated by Haima Vahid in collaboration with the Maktus Studio. Dimensions: 150x150mm Blank Inside Envelo...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Congrats Mother Fucker!

    Congrats Mother Fucker! Card designed and illustrated by Haima Vahid in collaboration with the Maktus Studio. Dimensions: 150x150mm Blank Inside En...

    View full details
    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Thanks For Wiping My Bum

    Thanks for wiping my bum Card designed and illustrated by Haima Vahid in collaboration with the Maktus Studio. Dimensions: 150x150mm Blank Inside E...

    View full details
    €4.00
    Sold out
  • €2.00

    Eat Your Fucking Cake

    Eat Your Fucking Cake Card designed and illustrated by Haima Vahid in collaboration with the Maktus Studio. Dimensions: 150x150mm Blank Inside Enve...

    View full details
    €2.00

Net Orders Checkout

Item Price Qty Total
Subtotal €0.00
Shipping
Total

Shipping Address

Shipping Methods