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Rude greeting cards

Rude & Offensive Greeting Cards

Chuckles guaranteed! Check out our collection of the rudest and most hilarious greeting cards out there, but be warned they are not for the faint-hearted!
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Throttle A Chicken

    Slow steady strokes Penelope, you're not trying to throttle a chicken here. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 148 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelop...

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    €4.00
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  • €4.00

    Terry The Jellyfish

    Life was tough for Terry the two-tentacled jellyfish◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • You Vile Bitch, You Fat old Cunt - Maktus
    €4.00

    You Vile Bitch, You Fat Old Cunt

    You vile bitch, you fat old cunt Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Sniff It Barry, It's Not Marmite

    Sniff it Barry, its not Marmite.... Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 148 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • Moody cunt card - Maktus
    €4.00

    Moody cunt card

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with brown craft envelope

    €4.00
  • Awkward Star Trek Orgy - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    Awkward Star Trek Orgy

    Awkward Star Trek Orgy Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 150 mm x 150 mm◙ White Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
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  • €4.00

    Sorry It's Fucking Rubbish!

    Here's your birthday card. I'm gonna spill my sacks! Sorry It's Fucking Rubbish!◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dis...

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    €4.00
  • Visualise your Goal - Modern Toss - Maktus
    €4.00

    Visualise your Goal - Modern Toss

    Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with brown craft envelope

    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Old And Wrinkly

    I'll still love you , even when your balls are old and wrinkly. Blank inside, 177x127mm, printed on FSC accredited paper. Individually packaged in ...

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    €4.00
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  • Bang You On The Coffee Table - Maktus
    Sold out
    €4.00

    Bang You On The Coffee Table

    Banging your big toe on the corner of the coffee table is painful. The other kind of banging not so I hope!

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • Cup of shut the fuck up - Maktus
    €4.00

    Cup Of Shut The Fuck Up

    How about a nice cup of shut the fuck up? Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope  

    €4.00
  • Fuck You Cat - Maktus
    €4.00

    Fuck You Cat

    Fuck You Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Play With His Balls

    She Loved Nothing More Than To Play With His Balls. Blank inside, 177x127mm, printed on FSC accredited paper. Individually packaged in a cello bag ...

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    €4.00
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  • See this cat - Maktus
    €4.00

    See This Cat.. It Doesn't Give A Fuck About Your Birthday

    See This Cat.. It Doesn't Give A Fuck About Your Birthday Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • To a special cunt - Maktus
    €4.00

    To A Special Cunt

    To A Special Cunt Blank inside, 175x125mm, individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Why The Long Face?

    Why The Long Face? Give me some beer you cunt. Horse in bar illustration  Blank inside, 170x120mm, individually package in a cello bag with a yello...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    You're So Beautiful, Like A Tree

    You're So Beautiful, Like A Tree Or A High Class Prostitute...show us a more hilarious card!  Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 105 mm◙ C...

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    €4.00
  • Colour In The Sections - Maktus
    €3.95

    Colour In The Sections

    Colour in the sections you have completed in your life so far. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 180 mm x 125mm◙ Coloured Envelope Included.◙ Quic...

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    €3.95
  • Help The Fanny - Maktus
    €3.95

    Help The Fanny

    Help the fanny reach climax Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 180 mm x 125mm◙ Coloured Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €3.95
  • Seriously? You Were The Sperm That Won? - Maktus
    €4.00

    Seriously? You Were The Sperm That Won?

    Seriously ? You Were The Sperm That Won Greeting Card The perfect funny, quirky, cool Irish designed birthday greeting card from our Range of greet...

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    €4.00
  • Old Bollox - Maktus
    €4.00

    Old Bollox

    Shitty cards for Shitty Occasions Enjoy Your Special Day You Old Bollox Greeting Card Designed in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  Inside Mess...

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    €4.00
  • Shut the fuck up - Maktus
    €4.00

    Shut The Fuck Up

    Well Done! Now Shut The Fuck Up About It Greeting Card The perfect funny, quirky, cool Irish designed birthday greeting card from our Range of gree...

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    €4.00
  • €2.00

    Get My Hand On Your Meat

    I wanna get my hands on your meat! Who doesn't love a nice bit of salami, frankfurter and bologna sausage? Well if you're as hungry for some meat a...

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    €2.00
  • €4.00

    Fathers Day Fucking Kids

    Fathers Day Fucking Kids Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 120 mm x 170 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Birthday Poo

    Birthday Poo Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 140 mm x 140 mm◙ Orange Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • Next Stop - Maktus
    €4.00

    Next Stop - The Knackers Yard

    We all love some crap art and as you're getting old that means your getting wheeled off to the knackers yard to be turned into glue, could be worse...

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    €4.00
  • Still A Cock - Maktus
    €4.00

    Still A Cock

    Happy Birthday. Sadly You're No Longer A Spring Chicken But You Are Still A Cock Greeting Card Designed in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  In...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Cock In A Box

    From a secret admirer.....cock in a box Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 120 mm x 170 mm◙ Brown Craft Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Spider Simulator

    Spider Simulator Inside Message: Blank ◙ Dimensions: 140 mm x 140 mm◙ Orange Envelope Included ◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    Ya Big Tick

    Happy Birthday Ya Big Tick Greeting Card The perfect funny, quirky, cool Irish designed birthday greeting card from our Range of greeting cards. De...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    You Look Like Shit

    You Look Like Shit, Dave.◙ Dimensions: 170 mm x 120 mm◙ Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dispatch!

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    How To Be A Happier Person Children Bin

    Does it spark joy? Nope? Ok in the bin it goes then. Inside Message: Blank◙ Dimensions: 148 mm x 105mm◙ Bright Yellow Envelope Included.◙ Quick Dis...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Fan Fucking Tastic!

      Illustrated by Katie Abey Card dimensions: 105 x 148mm (A6). Packed with a brown fleck envelope.Standard letter post.Blank inside.

    €4.00
  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Shit Fuck Damn Sorry!

    Shit Fuck Damn Sorry! Illustrated by Bench Pressed.Lovingly letterpressed at 1973 HQ using a 1962 Heidelberg Windmill Platen on luxurious recycled ...

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    €4.00
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  • Sold out
    €4.00

    Beardy Bush

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with cream envelope

    €4.00
    Sold out
  • €4.00

    Licking his balls

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with cream envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Knickers

    Blank inside 175x125mm on an FSC certified uncoated board Individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    HRT

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Loved Good Fart

    Blank inside 178x127mm on an FSC certified gloss finished board Individually package in a cello bag with coloured envelope

    €4.00
  • 17 Million - Maktus
    €4.00

    17 Million Birthday Card

    You've the same birthday as Seventeen million other people- Not so fucking special now, are you?! Greeting Card Designed and sold in Dublin by the ...

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    €4.00
  • €13.95

    'Put The Fucking Lid Down' Toilet Vinyl lid sticker

    Toilet Lid Vinyl 'Put The Fucking Lid Down' All decals are made with high quality permanent vinyl.Designed to fit a standard toilet seat.Each decal...

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    €13.95
  • €4.00

    Leo Picks you something Special

    This year I thought I'd pick you something very special- Leo Varadkar. Join Leo and the boys for some partying and boozing!! Designed in store  The...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Cake and Cock Greeting Card

    I hope Your Birthday is Filled With Love Laughter and Co - Hey! You knew what I meant! Designed in Dublin by the Maktus art department!  Inside Mes...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Inner Peace Greeting Card

    'The quest for inner peace begins with these 4 magical words... ...not my f*cking problem'' Blank inside, 150 x150mm, Printed on FSC accredited bo...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Magical Bitch Greeting Card

    'Happy Birthday to the most magical bitch I know' Blank inside, 150x150mm, Printed on FSC accredited board sourced from sustainable sources

    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Piss Yourself

    'Happy Birthday - May you live long enough to piss yourself, and frighten small children.' Blank inside, 150 x150mm, Printed on FSC accredited boa...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    Menopausal Greeting Card

    There was a very good chance she was feeling menopausal Each card measures 5″ x 7″ and comes with a coloured envelope. Printed on FSC certified glo...

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    €4.00
  • €4.00

    50 CHILDISH TWAT

    Happy Birthday 50, How are you this old and still a massive childish twat - Greeting card Blank inside, 150x150mm, printed on FSC accredited paper....

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    €4.00

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